mistake with an ex, and a coworker.

If you are reading this I hope first of all that you are having a good day. I did a horrible thing the past couple weeks, and that is why I have been absent.

If you have read my past two blogs, you would know that I was done with my ex and I wasn’t ever going to talk to him. Well we were still friends on one social media site, and he left funny comments on some of my pictures and we slowly started talking again. Texts became long phone calls and before you knew it, we were back where we started…

He was telling me how much he loved me and how stupid he felt of letting me go blah blah BLAH. I told him I am moving on, and he said no matter what, if you get involved with someone else or not, at the end of the day I know it is gonna be me and you that gets married. I told him what?! I don’t believe that. He is the type of guy that I feel has played with my head when I was always at my lowest point. BOTTOM LINE: NEVER GO BACK OR LET SOMEONE IN THAT BROKE YOU; IT WONT FIX YOU OR HELP. YOU ARE LEFT WITH THE SAME CONFUSION OF WHY IT ENDED.

We kept talking on the phone and were planning to see each other and since we are coworkers he always flirts with other women at our work to get back at me because he is aware it bothers me. The sad thing is he continues to do it after he said he wouldn’t. On social media he commented on one of the girl’s pictures with her body up against a wall “Damn what a lucky wall” LOL. And she is married but insecure.

There are more things like he would always hide her texts from me and in front of me he will say things to her like “hey why didn’t you text me back?” or “hey text me” and looks at my face knowing I will feel hurt by it.

So after crying my eyes out that night, I finally decided this is it. I have to end ALL communication with this lying asshole. If he is flirting with an older woman who is married and has kids, and said he wouldn’t already tells me enough. He doesn’t “LOVE” me. I am not the “LOVE” of his life. BULL. SHIT. It was all a game to him. To play with my head. Good thing I never had sex with him.. Thank GOD. Thank you GOD.

The joke is on me. Why would I even be attracted to an old ass man who is nothing but full of his own ego. I know I sound bitter right now, but if you knew him he is the type of guy who will like his own facebook and instagram post every single. time.

So anyways, the fact that I am still talking about this man is ridiculous. I had some therapist help, and they said this man needs to be CUT out of your life. He doesn’t respect you, love you, or even care about you. Because if he did, he wouldn’t do things that he knows hurts you. I blocked him on everything. If he has reached out via text or call I wouldn’t know and I don’t care anymore. His love meant absolutely nothing. He is into every woman it seems that shows him some type of attention. Therefore, my love for him feels dumb. If anyone can have it, I don’t want it.

The sad thing is I work with both of them and I have to see them. Which I don’t care because they deserve each other. Both insecure hopeless souls. I am dating now, and realize there are so many better people with character out there.

Sorry I had to get this anger out. Have you ever broke up with a coworker and ended on horrible terms, because they were such a liar? I have been happier dating new people and letting go of any emotion that was felt, since he treats every woman in the same flirty way.

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